Secrets
by xPeterPanNeverFailsx
Summary: For my own safety, there had always been two things that I had kept to myself. The first: they had made one huge mistake when they brought me to Neverland. I was no lost boy. The second, well, I suppose it's a secret for a reason.
1. Discoveries

**So, I've recently discovered I have a bit of an obsession with Peter Pan. I find that fact that they made him the villain fascinating and I can't seem to stop writing about him…I keep getting all of these ideas. This is just another product of my wild imagination. **

**Disclaimer: I do not own Once Upon a Time or any of its characters.**

**xxxxx**

I was sixteen when Pan's shadow brought me to Neverland. I was from a good family, not the most wealthy for someone from the streets of London in 1922, but we were happy enough. But that had been a long time ago. Decades had passed while I lived, never aging in the deep forests of this unknown island. I'm sure at first my parents had searched for me, but we weren't rich enough to be able to pay for the search to last any longer than a year. After that, they would have declared me missing. Surely by now, they would have given up. At least, that's what I hoped.

Because that life was a world away. And I had moved on.

While they had searched tirelessly, I embraced my new life as a lost boy. They taught me how to hunt and fish. I learned how to make a bow, now my weapon of choice. As a right of passage, I had been told that I would have to sleep outside on the ground until I was able to make my own hut, so I taught myself. And as the years passed, I grew close with the other boys and their fearless leader. They knew everything about me, and I them. There were no secrets between the lost boys. But for my own safety, there had always been two things that I had kept to myself.

The first: they had made one huge mistake when they brought me to Neverland. I was no lost _boy_.

The second, well, I suppose it's a secret for a reason.

But back to the first problem. In hindsight, perhaps the fact that I like to keep my dark hair cut short was not the best decision as a sixteen year old girl. When I was a child I wore my hair long, but as I grew up, washing it had become a hassle, so I decided to chop it all off one day. And the wiry frame I was cursed with didn't help. I had no curves, as girls my age usually did. So with my hair and my build, I suppose it would be quite easy to mistake me for a small boy instead.

When the shadow first dropped me on the island, though technically it dropped me in the ocean, Pan had naturally been the first to find me, dripping wet in my button up pajama shirt and pants. He must have been expecting me because he grinned and beckoned for me to follow. I did for no other reason than I had no clue where I was or where other people may be. He led me to a clearing where a group of boys danced around a fire as one of the older ones played a sort of flute.

"Listen up boys!" he called and the music and dancing stopped. All attention turned to us. "We have a new recruit today." He continued. "Tell us your name." he said, turning to me.

I stared wide eyed at the group of boys looking at me, some with glares, others with curiosity. And I did the only thing I could. I answered. "I'm Sam," I stuttered out, "Sam Tyler." I finished stronger.

There was a moment of silence after I stopped speaking that was soon broken by Pan's laughter. "Welcome to Neverland Sam!" he said, gesturing grandly. "These are the lost boys and I'm Peter Pan. Now, why don't you join us." He said, pushing me forwards toward the group of boys who had started dancing again. I looked warily towards the large group, but then the music finally reached me. It seemed to echo in a deeper part of my soul than anything I had heard before and I couldn't help myself. I leapt into the fun.

After that my integration into the world that is Neverland became much easier. It was obvious even without being told that Peter was the leader of this misfit band of boys. What he says goes. When he introduced me as one of them, they accepted it. At first, the boys all seemed to think that I was no older that thirteen because of my size and face, not to mention my voice. I still had some feminine features after all. Needless to say that when I told them my actual age, hardly anyone believed it.

Felix was the first to mention it to Pan one night at dinner. He was the most skeptical. Being only seventeen himself, I think he found it hard to believe that such a small, 'pretty' boy could be only a year younger than him. So Pan asked, and no one lies to Pan. When my answer remained the same, it became truth and that was that. I was accepted.

And so it remained for decades. Until the day Pan found out my secret.

Someone had been feeding information to the pirates, Hook and his gang that lived out on the Jolly Rodger, rarely venturing onto land. Now, everyone knew that there was a mole among the lost boys. What they didn't know was that Pan had been questioning every lost boy, one by one, after which they were sworn to secrecy. So when Pan asked me if I wanted to join him hunting, I took it as the honor it was and accepted.

We had been walking in silence for about an hour, stopping every once in a while to check traps or shoot down a bird perched in a tree, when he turned to me and raised his sword to my throat. I stopped, eyes wide, staring at him.

"As you know, someone has been feeding the pirates information about us and our camp. I'm going to figure out who it is." He stated.

"It isn't me." I blurted, still a bit stunned with the sword he was pointing at me.

"Yes, well I'd expect the mole to say that." He rolled his eyes before returning to glaring. "You disappear every night at the exact same time. You have for as long as I can remember. Where do you go?" he accused.

"To my hut." I answered honestly. As much as I enjoy my life on the island, I am still a girl. I need my space from the boys, so I took to retiring early instead of staying up playing with the other lost boys.

"Why?" he continued.

"I need space." I answered a bit hotly. I was getting irritated with this questioning. I had never been anything but loyal to him.

He began to lower his sword, almost believing me. Then something appeared to occur to him and he raised it again, advancing on me until my back was against a tree. "No." he paused. "No, you're hiding something. You may think you're fooling everyone and you do play a nice game. You fit in well, smile and play like all the others. But I see you when they look away, the way you glance around. I see how cautious you are around the other boys. You're hiding something. What have you been keeping from me and the other lost boys?"

He was right. I was cautious so as to hide my gender from the other boys. And of course Peter had noticed. He saw everything. So now I faced a choice. Either I kept my secret and Pan killed me for treason or I tell the truth and risk his wrath.

"Fine. You're right. I have been keeping a secret." I paused and his eyebrows rose expectantly. "I am no lost boy." I said. Poor choice of words.

Before I knew it, I was pinned between the tree I was backed up against and Pan, his sword pressed firmly to my throat. His eyes flared in anger and his mouth pulled into a snarl.

"I knew it. You're the traitor." He growled. I glared up at him, my blue eyes holding steady with his green.

"No. You misunderstand." I said. His eyes narrowed in confusion. "I have always been loyal to you, but I am no lost _boy_." I said again, this time putting emphasis on the last word. Pan froze and my words sunk in. After a few moments, what I said appeared to sink in and the reality of my words hit him. He lowered his sword, but otherwise did not move. The fact that he had missed something that now must appear so obvious to him left him a bit stunned.

"You're not a boy?" he asked, still a bit confused. I nodded.

"You're a _girl_?" he repeated, almost yelling that last word.

"Yes." I continued to hold his gaze in an attempt at a show of bravery. At the sound of my voice, he snapped out of his stupefaction and his trademark smirk returned.

"Then tell me, do you like the position we're in right now?" he asked, his voice teasing.

His question reminded me that I was currently pressed very closely between him and a tree with little chance of escape should he want to keep me there. I grasped for words. "I, uh…" I stuttered as my face heated. I wasn't able to get much else out because Pan continued speaking.

He leaned in closer, if that was even possible and said, "Tell me, do you long for touch?" he asked as he ran his fingers up my arm. "I know I do. After all, we're still both teenagers." His voice continued to get softer as he slowly lowered his head closer to mine. I tried to pull my face away, but he wouldn't let me. "I can see the longing in your eyes. Hear it in your breath." He whispered, lips inching closer. I couldn't help myself, my eyelids drooped in expectation.

Right as I thought he was about to kiss me, the warmth of his body left and my eyes shot open to see Pan walking backwards through the trees, still smirking. Of course, he wasn't going to kill me. He was going to torture me. That was always his style. Because, if it wasn't obvious before, it certainly was now.

My second secret: I am in love with Peter Pan.

"Well dearie. Thank you for hunting with me today." He called to where I was still standing against the tree. "I trust you won't tell anyone about our little chat. In return, I'll keep your secret. For now." He laughed. "I think I'm going to enjoy this game." He said, then turned to walk away, leaving me standing alone.

**xxxxx**

**I haven't decided if I want to continue this story or leave it. **

**If you like this, please read my story What You Care About Most.**

**I hope to continue writing one-shots for Pan (each will stand alone). Let me know what you think.**


	2. Lost Girl

**A big thank you to ParadoxalMindElla1, princess26966, luvduv123, ElektraMackenzie, and Guest for your reviews. You have encouraged me to continue.**

**xxxxx**

That night, instead of going to my hut after dinner, I stayed out and carved new arrows for my bow while the other lost boys played. Some of the boy wrestled with each other while the others danced around the fire as Pan played his pipes. None of them suspected anything about what had happened that day in the forest, and if Pan had his way, that wouldn't change. As I carved, I felt eyes on me. Looking up I saw Pan, playing his flute, staring at me from across the fire. I returned his gaze steadily. He stopped playing and tossed the pipes to Felix who continued where he had left off.

Pan picked himself up from where he had been sitting on a log and began to walk towards me. I held his gaze as he made his way around the fire. When he finally reached me, he made no move to sit down; he simply stood in front of me staring at me with his infuriating, if somewhat attractive, smirk. I stared back, refusing to be intimidated.

Finally, after what seemed like an eternity of just staring, Pan bent over, leaning closer so as not to be overheard. I stayed frozen, wary of his closeness after the incident in the forest earlier. I stared forward as his face stopped next to mine and he breathed into my ear. "It's a pleasure to see you out so late, dear Sam. I do hope this becomes a habit of yours."

That was all he said before he pulled away and stood straight once more. Eyes wide with surprise from his words and once again flushed from his proximity, I must have looked like a love struck girl…which I was, but that was beside the point. Seeming satisfied with the reaction he caused, Pan grinned and walked back to the other side of the fire, resuming his playing. All the while, he smirked at me.

I continued to whittle my arrows, ignoring the stare that was piercing a hole through me. After I had finished, I finally retired to my hut, leaving the lost boys and their leader behind.

xxxxx

A week later nothing had changed. I had taken to carving arrows after dinner while the other boys played. Pan always made a point to sit directly across the fire from where I was, regardless of where I sat, so as to stare hole through my head. However, I refused to give him the satisfaction of seeing it affect me. I remained focused on my task. The only exception was the second night after he learned my secret. I couldn't help it. I glanced up when I felt his eyes on me. What I saw was Pan wearing his trademark smirk. When he saw my look, he even had the gall to wink. After that, I made sure to keep my head down.

If the other lost boys noticed anything peculiar going on, they kept it to themselves. The only one who had openly said anything was Felix. After about three nights of the strange interaction between Pan and myself, he had approached me.

"Is something wrong between you and Pan?" he had asked.

"No. Of course not. Why would you ask that?" I shot back, laughing like it was a ridiculous question.

"The way you two have been acting, it's almost like you have some sort of secret." Felix responded. I had to think fast. I doubted he would rest until he got a proper answer. He was incredibly loyal to Pan and he hated to see any sort or real conflict among the lost boys.

I sighed in mock defeat. "Alright. When we were out hunting the other day, Pan told me he was searching for the person who has been feeding information to the pirates. He interrogated me and asked me not to tell anyone. You can't let him know that I told you." I begged.

"I already knew he was doing that. Is that all?" Felix asked.

"Yes. You know I don't have any secrets from the lost boys." I said as innocently as possible. He seemed to buy it. Felix nodded, taking me on my word and walked away.

After that, I didn't have any trouble from him or the other lost boys. I guessed that meant that Pan was keeping my secret for now. He was enjoying his game too much to ruin it.

The next day, instead of letting the lost boys go out and hunt or play as he usually did, Pan called everyone to a meeting in the clearing. He jumped up on a log and yelled to get everyone's attention.

"Boys!" he called. "I have some wonderful news to tell you." his gaze swept around the group. When his gaze fell on me, I saw a twinkle of mischief and my gut clenched. I hoped, no prayed, he wasn't about to reveal me. But I was worrying for no reason. "As you know, there is a mole among us." He continued and I relaxed slightly. "Someone has been giving those nasty pirates information about us. And after weeks of searching, I finally know who it is." He paused for effect, looking around at all of us.

Before he could call a name though, one of the lost boys bolted. Shoving the other boys out of the way, he attempted to make his way into the forest. It wasn't one of the boys I usually spoke to, but of course we all knew who it was.

"Rufio, do running won't do you any good." Pan called after him as he disappeared in the trees. "I know this entire island. There's nowhere for you to hide." The rest of the lost boys, including myself, looked back to Pan.

"Why don't you go after him?" one called.

"No need. He knows better than to come back here. I doubt we'll ever see him again." He replied. "But if you do, kill him on sight. Traitors have no place among us." The boys nodded their heads in agreement. Pan hopped down from his log and made his way over to me. No one else moved.

"Well go on then. Move along. Do your duties." Pan said when he noticed that everyone was still looking at him. The crowd dispersed. I moved to walk away but Pan grabbed my arm, preventing me from going anywhere. "Not you." he said. "You'll be hunting with me again today." He finished, mischief back in voice.

"The perhaps you'll let me go get my bow." I responded, knowing I had no chance of escape, just like Rufio. Pan released his grip and I went to retrieve my weapon, tucking the knife I had into my belt as well. As I walked back to meet Pan in the clearing, I prepared myself for whatever this excursion was about to entail. Whatever Pan had in store, hunting certainly had nothing to do with it. Of that I was sure.

When I finally reached Pan he did not grin or smirk, as per his usual self. He simply gave a small half smile, just a twitch of his lips, before turning and heading toward the woods, no looking back to see if I was following. Odd, but still seeing no other option, I trailed after him as expected.

He said nothing as we walked through the trees, me close on his heels. I may have been afraid of what was in store for me, but being alone in these woods scared me more. As we walked, I wondered if his current silence or what was about to be unleashed should frighten me more. I believed, in the end, it would be his silence that was more painful. At least when he was yelling, he looked at you, was speaking to you. With silence, you had no idea of the other's thoughts.

Love is such a silly thing.

I was so lost in thought, I almost ran into Pan, not noticing that he had stopped.

"Stop here." He said turning to me. "What do you feel?" he asked more calmly than I had imagined his voice would be when he finally spoke. The question confused me so I stared at him, brows knitted together as if he had spoken in some foreign tongue. My lack of response angered him. His eyes lit up with a fury I had never seen directed at me and he bared his teeth.

"I said, what do you feel?" he repeated, saying each word louder, yelling the last word at the top of his lungs. I opened my mouth to respond, but he stopped me. "No, no, don't speak." He said. I shut my mouth. "I've been thinking about your little confession last week. It's been whirling about in my head." Pan started pacing in a circle around me. I did not move. "I thought, 'why would Sam tell me something like that?' why would you tell me something that couldn't possibly be true? There is no way that I missed a girl among my ranks for decades. Then I thought, 'perhaps he did it to mess with my head. Perhaps Sam is the real traitor.'" He paused as he was passing I front of me, gaging my reaction. I kept my face as neutral as possible.

He resumed his pacing as he continued talking. "So, I called together that meeting this morning. Perhaps if I tell them that I have found the traitor, they will reveal themselves. And it worked, just not the way I expected. I watched each person so carefully. Your face revealed as much surprise as everyone else's. You're no traitor then." I did my best not to roll my eyes at that comment.

"So then I had another thought. 'Either Sam is lying, or trying to mess with my head.' So which is it? Are you lying to me Sam?" he stopped a few feet in front of me. When I did not respond he began yelling again. "Are you lying?!"

"No." I said. "I would never lie to you. You know that."

"Then why? Why tell me your secret? Why not keep it hidden?" he said, almost begging. Had I really gotten to him that much? The fact that I had kept something so important hidden for so long seemed to torment him.

"Because you can read us. Me. Felix. All of the lost boys. You were going to kill me. I had no other choice. I never would have been able to lie to your face without you seeing right through it." I said, and it was the truth. But there was another reason to. I think, deep down, I wanted him to finally know.

At my words, the anger seemed to deflate out of him and he walked toward me, stopping inches from touching me. "Then tell me," he said, much softer now, "what do you feel?"

I paused before answering and this time he did not yell at me for my hesitation, instead looking at me expectantly. "I feel the same things I always feel when I'm around you." I started, staring at his chest, tentative to look him in the eyes. "Loyalty. Awe. Hope. Courage. Joy." I paused and glanced up, meeting his gaze, if only for a moment. "Love." I whispered.

If he was fazed by my confession, he did not show it. "Not fear?"

"No. Never fear." I responded so quickly his eyes widened, brows arching.

"Why not?" he asked, voice low.

"You teach the lost boys to be brave." Was the only answer I gave him.

He chuckled. "But you are no boy."

"You taught me, just the same." I said, looking up to meet and hold his gaze this time, momentarily defiant.

"That I did." He said, his green eyes finally softening. "And I think I did the best job teaching you, my lost _girl_." He whispered, inching his face closer.

This time I kept my eyes open as he leaned forward, seemingly about to kiss me. I knew better. But Peter Pan was nothing if not unpredictable. So when he closed his eyes and pressed his lips against my cheek, all I could do was stand there. I didn't move, though there was nothing to keep me from backing away this time. And when he pulled away and looked at me I almost thought I saw a hint of kindness and sincerity in his eyes.

In a flash, it was gone and he was dancing away from me, laughing like his usual self. "Well dearie, it looks like we're taking this game to a whole new level." He said, teasing, and turned and ran into the trees.

But this time things were different. This time I ran after him. This time I returned the smirk he always wore. Because now, I was ready to play.

**xxxxx**

**Please continue telling me your thoughts. I love hearing from all of you.**


	3. Games

It had been three days since our game of cat and mouse had begun. So far, our little game had not gone any further than smirks across the fire, teasing, and a few practical jokes. But it was enough that when I emerged from my hut this morning to see him staring at me with his devil's grin from across the clearing, only to have him run off as soon as I made eye contact, that I knew that I was supposed to follow him. Smiling to myself, I followed, trying to go as unnoticed as possible.

If it were to be found out by the other boys that I was a girl, and that Pan knew, the result could be disastrous. I could be taken back home. Or worse, they may want to join his game.

_**Flashback**_

_Five weeks after the shadow had dropped me in the ocean surrounding Neverland and I still kept mostly to myself. Sure, I spoke to the other boys, but the only one who had made any attempts at becoming my friend was Felix, and he tried to treat me like a little brother despite the fact that I was only a year younger than him. Still, it was better than nothing. _

_I tried to join in on the group games, but I tended to be picked last because I was still so new. Not to mention my female frame made me seem a lot weaker than I actually was. I just hadn't had the chance to show it yet. _

_Today, one of those group games was taking place and I was determined to prove myself. If I was going to live with a bunch of boys for the rest of eternity, I was at least going to have some of their respect. With that thought in mind, I went out in the clearing to listen to Pan who was currently standing on a tree stump, towering above the rest of us. _

"_Listen up boys!" he shouted, getting the chattering boys' attention. "Today's game is capture the flag." He said and a cheer went up. Pan waited patiently for everyone to quiet down before continuing. "There will be two teams; each will hide a flag on their side of the playing field. You will each take a sword as well as your weapon of choice. No one is allowed more than two weapons. If you are disarmed, you are out of the game. Felix and I will be team captains. The game begins when you hear my call. You win if you get the other team's flag back to your side, or if all the members of the opposing team are knocked out of the game." He finished. _

_Pan motioned for Felix to go stand opposite him. "I will be so kind as to let Felix have first pick."_

_Felix raised his eyebrow but said nothing in response. "Jack." He called out. The older boy stepped to Felix's side of the clearing. All eyes turned to Pan._

"_Sam." He called out. Now, I can tell you the exact moment that I began to fall for Peter Pan, and that was it. Shocked, and with the rest of the boys glaring holes in my head, I made my way over to stand next to our leader. I was so dazed that I didn't even hear the rest of the names being called out. It wasn't until I felt a tugging on my sleeve that I even realized we were going to hide our flag. I ran to catch up._

_I caught up with Pan, who was at the back of the group, and paused to walk with him. We walked I silence for a moment before I spoke. "Why did you pick me first?" _

_Pan glanced my way, lips quirking up in a small smile. "Because I saw the look on your face when you walked into the clearing." He paused and I gave him a confused look. "You want to prove yourself. I'm giving you that chance. Don't waste it." He warned and dashed to the front of the group. _

_We hid our flag and waited another five minutes to give the other team time. When Pan decided we had waited long enough he cupped his hands to his mouth and yelled. "Come on boys! Let's play!"_

_The rest of our team dashed off into the forest, but I stayed behind with Pan. We were to guard the flag. I looked at him one last time. He winked and said, "time to show me what you've got." _

_So I did._

_When the first two boys from the other team showed up, Pan hid. He had said that 'it would be cheating if he helped me'. I drew my sword. I may not have been the best at making friends, but I hadn't been doing nothing in my time on the island. Felix had trained me in sword fighting nearly every day, though no one else knew this. The two boys, the twins Michael and Aaron, who had found us, grinned like they had just won the lottery._

"_Well, look who they left all alone to guard their flag." One said._

"_This is going to be an easy win." Spoke the other as they advanced on me. Now it was my time to grin._

"_Try not to make this too painful, okay?" I said as innocently as possible. The twins paused and looked at each other. _

"_Fine." Said the first. _

"_We'll fight you one at a time." Said the other._

"_That is, if you can beat the first one." Teased the first. _

_The twin to my left, Michael I believe, began to advance again. Bad move. I knew from watching them, as well as the other lost boys, that he was one of the weaker swordsmen. This would be easy. The boy swung and I quickly raised my sword to block. His eyes widened a bit. He hadn't expected me to be strong enough to counter his blow. I used his surprise to my advantage. I slid my sword down to the hilt of his and twisted, forcing the sword out of his hand. It clattered to the ground. _

"_Looks like you're out." I said. "Next." I looked to the other twin who now wore an irritated expression on his face. _

_Instead of advancing on me slowly as his brother had done, Aaron ran at me full speed. All the same, when his sword came down, I caught it with mine. Aaron pulled away immediately and swung again, aiming for my legs. I may have been small, but I was fast. I jumped to avoid the crippling blow and landed on one foot. I spun around and twisted my hand so that when I struck him in the back of the head, I hit him with the blunt end of my sword. He crumpled to the ground and I kicked the sword out of his hand. He was unconscious, but he would have nothing worse than a nasty bruise. _

_Michael gaped at his fallen brother sputtering incoherent words. But my attention was on the trees where a slow clap was emanating from. "Good job Sam." Said Pan as he emerged. "I think you will make a fantastic lost boy. Michael, take your brother back to camp." The still gaping boy stared at his leader before hefting his brother up and carrying away._

_After that, Pan decided that it would be a fun game to see just how many of the lost boys could best, so he left me to guard the flag alone again. For the remainder of the game, he watched as I defended, only lending a hand when he thought I was in danger of losing, which intern meant that he would lose. Of the ten boys on the other team, Pan was delighted to see that I could best seven of them on my own, not including Felix of course. He had come last, when he had finally determined that he was on his own. _

_When he saw me alone in the clearing he seemed surprised. "I knew I taught you well, but I didn't think you were capable of defeating my entire team by yourself." He drawled, raising his sword._

"_Then even you still underestimate me." I teased. _

"_Well, he did have a bit of help." Called Pan from the trees as Felix began to advance. Seeing his leader, and best swordsman on the island, Felix dropped his sword and raised his hands in surrender. _

"_That's no fun Felix. You should know better than that." Said Pan. "Pick up you weapon and play with me." He did so. "Sam, sit back. It's my turn." _

_I watched in awe as the sparred, their blades dancing as they fought. I kept my eyes fixed on Peter as he spun, blocked and countered. Never had I seen anything so beautiful. But it wasn't long before Felix was disarmed and Peter was whooping with joy. I couldn't help but join in. _

"_The game is won." Yelled Pan. Felix sighed in defeat, even though he had been expecting it. Pan dashed off into the trees towards camp since the game was over. Little did I know that would be that start of a much different game for me._

_**End Flashback**_

That memory flashed through my mind as I followed Pan into the trees once again. That had been the start. The day I truly became a lost boy. The beginning of the game that Pan and I would play. The start of my feelings. That had been the day I had seen his joy for life shine through, during that fight. There had been no going back from that point. 

I walked into the trees blindly, guessing the direction Pan had turned after I had lost sight of him. I quickly got lost, so I began to wander aimlessly, hoping that this was just part of Pan's game. Right when I started to lose hope of finding him, something hit the back of my head. I turned but saw nothing behind me. Another hit caused me to turn back. Still nothing.

I started to get frustrated as things kept flying from the trees to pelt me from every direction, but always hitting me in the back somewhere. Just as I was about to yell, I heard chuckling. _Pan_.

I stopped spinning and the devil jumped from the trees to land right in front of me. I gave him a halfhearted glare, but he simply smirked in return.

"I had you going there for a minute." He laughed, but his expression quickly turned sour. I gave him a confused look.

"What's wrong?" I asked.

"I been thinking." He said.

"Well now, we can't have that." I joked, but the glare he shot me in return quickly shut me up.

"I've been having some really strange thoughts." He paused. "Thoughts that I don't understand."

"What about?" I pressed when he stopped speaking.

"That's just it. They're all about you." I looked at him in surprise. Thoughts about me? "I can't seem to get you out of my head. I'm keep finding myself wondering about where you are when you're not at camp, what sort of games I could come up with that you would enjoy. I don't understand what's happening to me and I don't like it." He said, getting more urgent and more irritated as he spoke. "The games I have played before have never felt like this. People are no more than pawns."

I winced at his words. He continued talking before I had any chance to speak up.

"I keep thinking that it's because I know your secret. That the fact you're a girl changes things. So I've come to the conclusion that I should tell the lost boys. Perhaps if the same thing happens to them that's happening to me, someone can explain it." He said almost frantically.

It took all of my willpower to not gasp or shout aloud at that comment. I couldn't have him telling my secret. The other lost boys would kill me, with or without Pan's permission.

"Please, don't. They'll kill me. They will not accept a girl as one of them." I said as convincingly as possible.

"Why not? I'm Peter Pan! I'm your leader. Your king." He said getting angrier.

I thought fast. I needed to calm him down. "But I'm enjoying our game so much. Wouldn't it be cheating if you told the others?"

His eyebrows raised in surprise at my question, then creased as he considered my words. Peter Pan did not like cheaters. I looked at him, hopeful that would be enough to convince him, but he shook his head as if to dispel those thoughts after about a minute.

"No, no. I need to understa-" I cut him off. He was not going to listen to my words, so perhaps action would work better. I did the only thing I could think of.

I kissed him.

I grabbed Peter by the shoulders and pulled his face to mine, crushing our lips together, effectively silencing him. I felt his entire body go ridged with shock, but I kept my lips pressed to his. It took a few moments, but he finally responded, returning the kiss. It was simple, and he did not move to touch me, but I could feel him relax through my hands which had stayed on his shoulders.

Pan pulled away first. He looked slightly dazed, as if he hadn't ever done something like that before. When his eyes focused, his emerald orbs landed on my blue ones and froze. As we stared at each other, I saw a rush of emotions flit across his face. Confusion, surprise, kindness, frustration, and what almost looked like love, before settling on his trademark mischievous look. He leaned back, slower than the day he had pressed his lips to my cheek, but did not move further than a foot away. His fingers moved to trace the length of my arm, almost appearing to be grasping for some hold on reality.

"Now who said you could do that?" he questioned, a teasing lilt to his words, anger gone.

"Who said I couldn't?" I replied, bantering back. "You never laid any rules for this game."

Pan raised his brows. His look of surprise faded quickly though, only to be replaced with one of near admiration. "It looks like you're finally learning how to play." He said and pressed another quick kiss to my lips, catching me off guard.

He pulled away before I had the chance to react. "I knew I'd enjoy this game." He whispered in my ear, and then backed away.

"Wait!" I called before he got too far. He stopped and looked at me. "What are you going to do? About me?" I clarified.

"I suppose I'll keep your secret. Like I said, I'm enjoying myself." He responded. "In return, you won't tell the others about this. We wouldn't want the boys thinking I've got a weakness, would we?" he asked, though he spoke it as a statement. I shook my head.

"Good. Then I think it's time we get back to camp." He said, coming back towards me and taking my hand, pulling me after him.

I smiled to myself as I look at the back of the head of the boy I cared so much for. I may just be a toy to him most days. This may only be a game to the great Peter Pan. And I knew as I followed him that I would likely get burned in the end. But what could I do? I am a girl in love. So for right now all I could think was that maybe, just maybe, some secrets were worth keeping.

**xxxxx**

**So what was meant to be a one-shot turned into a three part story instead. Thank you once more to my lovely reviewers. You are my motivation.**

**To those of you that I cannot respond to using PMs:**

**Guest- Thank you for your support. It means a lot.**

**Harmony- So glad you enjoyed my story.**

**Talyssa- I hope this final chapter cleared up anything you did not understand. I tried to keep Pan as in character as possible while still showing a slightly softer side of him. Thank you for reading and for the advice which I incorporated into the story. **

**Flight of the Snowy Owl- Thanks for the support! Hope you enjoyed this chapter as much as the previous ones.**


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